Light Upon Light

Reverted

Sat, 28 Jul 2012 12:10:59 +0800

Please follow me at my main tumblr! www.fingularity.tumblr.com

Syukran :)

Remembering Allah

Wed, 12 Oct 2011 17:30:18 +0800

To me, for myself, and by extension (perhaps) to others… Forgetting Allah and His Messenger is the main root of any issues that drag down our potential in anything and everything.

… because when you truly remember who you are, who He is and the relationship between the two of you, then mountains of ‘problems’ crumble to dust for you know that EVERYTHING that happens in this world, every knock, every tear, every pain in your heart, is but a gift from Him to you, allowing you to inch closer and closer to Him until He is finally able to beckon you into His paradise.

Remember Allah, Fadhilah. Remember Allah and Allah will remember you.

*breathe

Fri, 07 Oct 2011 10:46:33 +0800

I have not written for a while now; it’s hard to write when there’s no internet in my mahallah and carrying the heavy mac to school everyday isn’t an option really.

Things have not been good. Losing your bestfriend in school, finding out that someone close to you might have autism, not being able to concentrate on anything, sleeping to stop voices in my head… I held it all inside for weeks, telling myself that I could handle it, but wallahi when Suraya and Ameerah forced me to sit down and talk it out (they literally forced me to sit down and interrogated me “Asal muka kau asyik macam sedih! cakap!”, I just felt a huge burden go off my shoulders and when I was chatting with Shahidah, suddenly the tears started pouring out.

Like Kak Lina says, “Enough is enough.”

Here’s to good friends who are always there for you, and here’s to new beginnings.

marcmanley: Know what you’re here to do. I am reminded here, in...

Mon, 22 Aug 2011 22:09:24 +0800

marcmanley:

Know what you’re here to do.

I am reminded here, in the final sermon by ‘Umar bin ‘Abd al-Aziz, that we are all here with purpose and for a purpose. So many people today feel there have no purpose in life. So spread the word!

ربنا ما خلقت اهذا باطلا سبحانك فقنا عذاب النار

“O’ our Lord!, you have not created this in vain! Free from imperfection are You so save us from the Fire!” [Qur’an: 3: 191]

whispersofthysoul: athena-luna: hellomynameiscourtnee: lawyer-...

Sun, 21 Aug 2011 18:00:31 +0800

whispersofthysoul:

athena-luna:

hellomynameiscourtnee:

lawyer-up-assbutt:

moyashisandmugens:

icount27stars:

restlessasanavalanche:

rubiieloviie:

krxs10:

thejournalofalesbian:

swept-out-to-sea:

cams92:

venezianov:

(( Is it bad that I cried?

I really needed this.

Thank you, quiet place. ))

Reblogging myself.

I still have the tab open.

I really needed this. T__T <3

♥♥♥

Oh god. <3 Going here everyday.

EVERY SINGLE PERSON ON THIS PLANET NEEDS TO CLICK THIS

At first I thought it was an error, but then I got it and it’s like fucking epic. 8D

oh my god<3.

oh wow.

I think I’m just gonna leave this open in a tab cuz it’s really pretty…

THIS IS MY HOMEPAGE NOW

… Do I trust it ? But i must click ….

Second time reblogging this, it’s beautiful

I love this.

A Late Night Conversation...

Sat, 20 Aug 2011 02:55:14 +0800

… with Kak L makes me feel like uprooting not just out of Singapore (which i have been saying for the longest time) and to Malaysia… but to Britain. kwa kwa kwa~

moroccostateofmind: Mike Matas took over 4,000 photos on a...

Fri, 19 Aug 2011 20:30:30 +0800

moroccostateofmind:

Mike Matas took over 4,000 photos on a trip across Morocco and Spain with his girlfriend, and strung them together in this 2-minute video. This is incredible.

I just want to get away… from all of this. Ya Allah I need strength :’(

Terkecil Hati...

Fri, 19 Aug 2011 00:02:49 +0800

… tetapi jika Rasulullah kecil hati setiap kali ditolak, tidak mungkin da’wah dapat bergerak sedemikian lupa.

Luruskan niyyah untuk Allah, faddy.. untuk Allah.

:'(

Wed, 17 Aug 2011 01:18:23 +0800

I met my bestmanfriend, Hakim, for iftar today together with Nasuha. We’ve been best friends since primary six, but a couple of months back I wrote him a long letter on why it is haraam for us to be so close and that even though it hurts like mad and i cried for weeks on end before sending him the letter, it was the best for the both of us in His eyes.

We met today to celebrate our birthdays which were a week apart from one another. After terawih, we sat for a while drinking tea, and we laughed and smiled and just cherished the short window of time after months of not contacting.

When the time to part came, we smiled and waved to each other goodbye, but it was only later we found out through Nasuha, that both of us cried as we walked away from the other…

“She is the only friend I’ll cry for…”

He was the first to congratulate me when I wore the hijab, he was the first to cry for me out of happiness of my turning back to Him, and he was the first friend who actually stopped sharing certain things with me out of respect of my ‘new’ self and because he didn’t want me to drift away from him.

Ya Robb. Embrace Him with Your mercy, and Your love Ya Allah… Protect him and guide him, and show him the straight path so that he may be one of your beloved… insyaAllah ameen.

:”(

My Favourite Time of the Day...

Sun, 14 Aug 2011 11:20:59 +0800

… during Ramadhan is definitely sahur.

The clanking of dishes, praying fajr with the family, sitting in a circle taking turns reciting the Qur’an and the translations… Alhamdulillah, Ya Robb, for this ni’mah :)

“Kenapa senyap? Malaikat lalu…”

Sat, 13 Aug 2011 07:43:20 +0800

“Kenapa senyap? Malaikat lalu…”

Alhamdulillah...

Thu, 11 Aug 2011 23:46:00 +0800

For the first time in my terawih prayers this Ramadhan (the fourth actually, since The Leave came right on time), I prayed jemaah in a different masjid as opposed to the one in the neighbourhood and wallahi… when the imam takes his time and the body finds relaxation in prayer, and when the brain is given ample time to process the meaning of the ayat that resonated in the air…

SubhanAllah. Now do I truly feel that it is Ramadhan :’)

Allahumma innaka `afuwwun tuhibbul `afwa fa`fu `anna, Ya Kareem.

:')

Tue, 09 Aug 2011 07:31:46 +0800

Today, my dad stayed up after sahur to pray congregational fajr prayers and the subsequent tadabbur qur’an with the family; the first time he agreed to do so for the past 9 days that we have been doing the activity and asking him to join us.

I was feeling extremely elated inside when we were making sujood together, but wallahi, what got me tearing was when the verses we read (where Fauzi last stopped) began with,

O mankind, fear your Lord, who created you from one soul and created from it its mate and dispersed from both of them many men and women. And fear Allah , through whom you ask one another, and the family ties. Indeed Allah is ever, over you, an Observer. [An-Nisa’:1]

Allahuakbar!

InsyaAllah may he istiqomah in this path… There’s too much things in the past between us that cannot be changed, but what CAN be changed is our perceptions, and the future, insyaAllah.

It is hard for me to swallow my ego, my anger, my disappointment… but insyaAllah I will try… I will. A friend put it simply,

“You are still able to talk to him now so why don’t you? What if he dies tomorrow and you never find the opportunity to ever talk to him again? It is not what you want or what he wants. It is what Allah wants!”

Dingin Malam.

Sat, 06 Aug 2011 23:57:20 +0800

Teringin sangat malam ini untuk mendengar suaramu…
Namun ku tahu itu bukan yang terbaik untuk kau dan aku,
Dan ku kirimkan salam dan du’a agar kau kembali pada yang Satu..

“Bertenanglah. Dunia ini sukar kerana adanya syurga.”

Allah… Aku tahu ini dugaan dariMu… Aku kembalikan semuanya padaMu Ya Robb. Engkau yang mengatur segalanya… berilah aku yang terbaik untuk duniaku dan akhirahku….

23 Tahun

Mon, 01 Aug 2011 00:30:14 +0800

Diberi rezqi bertemu Ramadhan: hadiah paling ter-best I have received my entire life :)

Alhamdulillah...

Fri, 22 Jul 2011 00:04:53 +0800

Boleh tido nyenyak biiznillah hehehe :D

"Woe to her who mourns over her macbook’s depleting battery life, but fails to be anxious of..."

Wed, 13 Jul 2011 10:29:52 +0800

“Woe to her who mourns over her macbook’s depleting battery life, but fails to be anxious of her own time running out.”

- Uwaaaa malu nye dengan Allah uhuk uhuk uhuk.

Alhamdulillah...

Sun, 10 Jul 2011 09:15:47 +0800

I don’t have much… but as long as biiznillah I am able to touch hearts with my words and be present for my family and friends who want to return to Him, then insyaAllah, I know I am doing something for Islam, and I am able to answer Him on the Day of Judgement…

InsyaAllah..

The Rezqi of Having Her as My Mother

Sun, 10 Jul 2011 00:32:24 +0800

“MasyaAllah Ummi, I think next time I don’t have to attend anymore religious classes or lectures lah Ummi, I can just learn from you!”

My mother let out a soft laugh as she began walking away from her stall, hands clutching her trusty small pail in preparation for her prayers. I watched as she strolled away and began to marvel at the MAGNIFICENCE of this woman that Allah has given me the blessings of being able to call my mother.

I have mentioned this to many of my close friends and I will mention it again, “I probably will not be who I am today, if not for my mother.”

This is not an entry marking Mothers’ Day, nor is it her birthday or mine or any other special day, but this entry is something that this heart yearns to pour out as it spills with love and respect for a woman who has gone through so much of my nonsense when I was jahil for the most of my life :’)

I sat myself back down on the stool at the corner of my mother’s stall, and the conversation we had earlier began to replay itself in my head,

“… so Ummi, the ustazah was telling us about how we mankind tend to think and worry too much about our rezqi, when Allah has already sworn to give us rezqi. The whole process of working is just part of sunnatullah, that is, it is in the natural order of things that Allah has created such that rezqi will come when one works for it.

However, what most of us fail to remember is that the work we do does not necessarily equate to rezqi from Allah, for Allah can give us rezqi in any way that He wants; it does not have to be from THAT particular work we do.

For example, when we have flu today, we go to the doctors and eat medicine A, we get better. But when we have the same illness next week, we go to the same doctors and eat medicine A again, we might not get better. It is only when we try medicine Z that we finally do get better. It is the same effort, the same way, the same cure, but we do not get the rezqi of health.

Why? Because it is Allah who decides how that rezqi comes to us! It is not us, nor our work… So we just have to make du’a to Him, and go to work, and insyaAllah rezqi will come to us in many ways and forms, insyaAllah…”

My mom smiled and began to stand up, reaching for her pail. When she was at the edge of the stall’s entrance, she hesitated for a second and then turned around to face me (hehe so drama la my mother),

“Why do you think I am still here, at this stall? I really don’t earn much at all, you know, and I spend so much time here. People have been telling me to close the stall and work elsewhere, or stay home since I don’t earn anyway.

But just this afternoon, a couple of Indonesian maids came to buy some Qur’ans; they want to start reading in preparation for Ramadhan. And the other day, some other maids bought the prayer garments and some even bought the taharrah soap for when they have to handle the dogs belonging to their bosses.

Yes, I know I don’t earn much here and I can probably earn more to support all of you by working elsewhere, but I am the only one in this area who sells these Islamic things; where else can these muslim maids who cannot go out of the area purchase them if this stall were to close?

I do this for Allah swt, and I trust that Allah swt will provide my family with the rezqi we need to live each day. He has not failed us so far, hasn’t He?”

MasyaAllah, masyaAllah, masyaAllah. What faith! :’)

If I were to list out the many incidents that made me in awe of my mother’s faith in Allah swt and her resilience as a wife, a mother and a woman, I would probably never be able to stop writing.

But for now, all I can do is pray for forgiveness for the many moments I have made her cry and for all the countless times I have made her disappointed during my jahil days, and strive my best to be the best Muslimah I can, whose prayers will be accepted by Allah swt for when my mother returns to The One she loves…

Cik Habibah Terchenta, I can only pray that one day, I will be able to have an imaan as strong as yours, insyaAllah <3

P/s. Don’t worry about rezqi, for Allah has sworn that He will give it to us! ;D

"Nak Allah :’("

Sat, 09 Jul 2011 10:47:10 +0800

“Nak Allah :’(”